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Thursday, October 9, 2008

An Award comes my way!

Hi Friends,

Ever since I began blogging this year, your appreciative comments have encouraged me to post what can be called "an effort to make readers chuckle" with my humorous writeups.

Your encouragement has culminated in an Award for my Blog today!

Bill Austin has conferred the Blog of the Day Award to my Blog!



POTUS, George Bush as usual tried to prevent publicity of the event on US Television by signing the Nuclear Deal with India and hogging the limelight on PrimeTime TV world over.



But my well wishers and friends the world over lobbied and got my award reported on TV. But then dont you always say "Seeing is Believing?"

Some screen shots of the news announcements below.





A BIG Thank You to all readers, fellow bloggers and of course Bill Austin!

Blogger's Postscript 1 - POTUS is a recent acronym included in the Dictionary, meaning the President Of The United States.

Blogger's Post-Script 2 - Ooops! Forgot to thank my namesake who nominated me. I found him through Google-Searching my own name, or vanity searching as it is called.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Words of Indian Origin in the English Language

Dear Friends,

My article on Words of Indian Origin in English was published in the Kanara Saraswat Magazine, October 2008 issue

Read the article by clicking on the following link below:


Words of

Indian Origin

in the English

Language


I hope you do enjoy reading this article! Do leave your comments as always!

Thursday, October 2, 2008

ALL FINE, GUYS!

In response to my recent post "In the Thick of Pink", (if you havent read it please do) some of my friends forwarded me mails on related subject. The text of which are reproduced below:

Mail No. 1
Sub: The United State of US Banks

A Popular quote doing rounds post-Lehman, AIG fiasco...
" There are two sides to a Balance Sheet.- Left & the Right
( Liabilities and Assets respectively)
On the Left side there is nothing right.. and on the right side there is nothing left "

[Source: Email Forward]

Mail No. 2

Marc Faber comment on US economy Recently

Investment analyst and entrepreneur Dr. Marc Faber concluded his monthly bulletin (June 2008) with the following words:
''The Federal government is sending each of us a $600 rebate. If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, the money goes to China. If we spend it on gasoline it goes to the Arabs. If we buy a computer it will go to India. If we purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala. If we purchase a good car it will go to Germany. If we purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan and none of it will help the American economy. The only way to keep that money here at home is to spend it on prostitutes and beer, since these are the only products still produced in US. I've been doing my part.”
[Source: Email Forward]

ALL FINE WITH INDIA, THOUGH
The panic caused in the stock markets and anxious Indians withdrawing money from a reputed Indian Private Bank led the India’s Finance Minister appeared on TV and assure all Indians in a Javed-Jafri-esque manner “We are different!”

“OUR ECONOMY IS FINE”, he insisted.

I have never doubted the announcements of the Indian FM. Never.
The confusion however is caused by a recent acronym that goes thus:
FINE – F***ed, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotional


Pray tell me, Hon. FM, did you mean fine in lower case or FINE in upper case?

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Going Green for Now!

Going Green For Now!

Racing out with a triumphant smile from the developments taking place in the US in respect of the Indo-US Nuclear Deal, the Indian Prime Minister has cleared the next race like a true Olympian! Indians should be elated with the news of the signing of “a major co-operation pact which paves the way for the sale of French nuclear reactors to India”. The development opens up India’s foray into clean, green energy!

Suddenly, a series of Green Signals are flashing for India Right now!

Our Government’s steps to cover the shortfall in meeting the increasing demands of our country’s energy requirements are indeed deserving of praise and jubilation. The yawning gap was caused by the deep slumber for several decades much like the mythical sleeping icon, Kumbhakaran (a mythical character of the Mahabharata fame, who would sleep for months together). The power situation had been worsening in several parts of our country and one had begun wondering whether this was one ingenious way of keeping the common man in the dark.

Some skeptics, though, attribute the hurried steps taken by our honorable Prime Minister in respect of the US Nuclear Deal and the French one to the completion of the term of the UPA Government. Drawing inspiration from the performance of an Olympian runner while approaching the finish line head first, the momentum at which he has been dashing about heading to close finishes, event after event, is indeed praiseworthy! But it is said that skeptics always give us the peptics (Peptic Ulcers, that is).

Tons of carbon prints have been spent by bloggers on the controversy of the unclear nuclear deal (anagram intentional). A lot of heat has been generated in the ensuing debate though none have thrown any light on the deal itself. One wonders whether this energy could be converted into utilizable forms of energy? If we could, we would have enough electricity to go around to light up our Navratri pandals for the nine-day festivities beginning all over the country this year. Now that is a lot, believe me!

Read what a fellow Indian blogger, who has different views on the Nano Project of the Tatas, says in this post.

However, I am particularly amazed at the idea emerging from the excerpt reproduced below :-
“Toyota Prius uses the energy produced from braking and tries to replenish it for running the car. It also uses the kinetic energy produced from the spinning of wheels on a downhill to replenish some of the energy required to run the car. This would reduce the amount of energy (fossil fuel) needed to run the car. This car is best suited for city conditions. This was designed for US market.” [Source: http://trak.in]

I am beginning to wonder whether the brakes applied to such massive projects such as the Tata Nano Project, by the boisterous Mamata could be also tapped and utilized to spin the wheels of the entire state of West Bengal?
Or the sound bytes and heat generated over this issue and also several such on-going debates in our country be converted into utilizable forms of energy?
If so, we may not have to worry in the interim period until we convert the advantage of the deals into tangible benefits by setting up nuclear energy facilities.

Besides going green with alternative energy sources, the developments would make our neighboring countries green …..with envy, of course!

Saturday, September 27, 2008

In the Thick of Pink

I hope this post finds you in the pink...of health, I mean. Lots of guys are reeling under a heap of pink...pink slips, I hope you steer clear from it, that is! A Lehman Brothers employee has written about the mood in his office. He says that he has nothing to do with the cause of the hurricane Lehman that swept US and most of his colleagues are now worried - who would want to employ them now?

If you had been someone who had been responsible for it, my dear friend, you would have got the fattest severance package in the history of US mega corporations! And some dozen offers to boot from several firms to take them to dizzier heights, just for the thrills they seek.

By the way, since the US has been in the habit of naming hurricanes, why don’t they even begin naming the now certain waves of ‘financial crisis’, which also happen with some degree of certainty and regularity. The last wave saw the closure of Enron and Worldcom. This wave has just begun and has already seen several corporations reeling – Freddie Mac, Fanny Mae, Merrill Lynch, AIG, Lehman Brothers and still counting.

Maybe what we have seen is just the tip of the iceberg, the US Financial Crisis is the biggest misadventure in recent times. Recent times, incidentally means since the 1920’s, which saw the Great Depression!

Back home, there are huge signboards which scream:

“TV HO TO BIG TV HO!”
[Hindi for "If you must have a TV, it must be BIG TV"]

So, if one shouts out this slogan across mountains like Amitabh Bacchan does in “The Last Lear”, an echo will be heard from across the continents, thus:

“FINANCIAL CRISIS HO TO BIG FINANCIAL CRISIS HO!”
If truth be told, calling it a ‘financial crisis’ is a euphemism by itself, reducing the impact on what could be otherwise called a biggest fraud on innocent taxpayers and honest investors committed by builders, bankers and undeserving borrowers.

BTW, if you thought only people face the pink slip, think again. Some words in English are also facing the same fate. The Collins Dictionary is considering dropping 26 words from its next edition, since nobody is really using them. Read the report here - Words out of English Dictionary.

Now, Surgery will be assisted by Robots!
Recent reports and an article in Mumbai Mirror suggest that robots would be able to assist surgeons better than Operation Theatre nursing assistants.

So would nursing assistants also face a pink slip?

If someone really deserves a pink slip, it is the terrorists, who have been striking at regular intervals in this region - for doing their jobs well, though. But to do the honors, India’s Home Minister needs to take some tough action, or face the very same prospect – of a pink slip.

Blogger's Post Script: Today is Daughter's Day! Read Daughters are Forever blogpost!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

My Internet Chat with Ganapati Bappa!

I have been spending several hours with my laptop ever since I have begun to write with a renewed vigor early this year.
My daughter tells me that I am addicted!
My learned friend tells me that I have become a mouse potato!

“A mouse potato? What’s that?’, I ask.

“If you know that a ‘couch potato’ is one who slouches in his couch and watches Television all day, it would not be easy to understand ‘mouse potato’ – it is a person who spends a considerable amount of time with his computer!”

Indeed, in an effort to become Somebody, I have become a mouse potato!

Anyway, let me get on with my post.
The Ganapati Visarjan on Anant Chaturdashi, which ends the ten day festivities of Ganesh Chaturthi, celebrated with much fanfare in the state of Maharashtra, is a spectacular event.

A week later, I was surfing the net for some information, as I always do, when my Messenger flashed a Message:

“Ganapati Bappa is now online”
[Bappa, Marathi for Uncle]

Me: “My Pranams to you, Ganapati Bappa!” I typed in and waited.
Ganapati Bappa (GB): “Hi”, the reply came in!
Me: “Great pleasure, Ganapati Bappa! Nice to have you online ”
GB: “Wassup?”
Me: “Wow! You’re so modern!”
GB: “Oh, well, I come down so often .. that’s how the kids greet each other, isn’t it?”
Me: “Yes, I was just google-searching for some information”
GB: “Oh Google-searching, nice way to spread knowledge and information. This year the IT folks even sung the ‘Google Aarti’ after my Aarti, - I understand how it is!”

Me: “Bappa, some newspapers reported that in the effort to make idols eco-friendly, you have had to slim lately….”
GB: “Oh, how I would love to…you guys in Maharashtra are so innovative! Make me eco-friendly. If I need to slim down, so be it… I am game. No Plaster of Paris or toxic chemicals to make me look bright.Not good for the environment. I want my bhakts (devotees) to live in a clean environment”

Me: “I wonder how you react to the music in you pandals (enclosures)…”
GB: “I love to hear all those songs in praise of my virtues. But people should also have concern for the residents living near the pandal and reduce the decibel level of the blaring sound system. I am not hard of hearing, I love soft music. A lower volume would serve us all very well. I do not desire to be a cause of nuisance to the old and infirm senior citizens due to the blaring music systems!”

Me: “What about the filmy songs that follow…how do you react to that?”
GB: “Well…Hmmm… If I am with you for ten days, I have to bear with some of your nonsense, don’t I? This year it was ‘Touch me, Touch me, Touch me’”

I just got the urge to log off. I just hoped Bappa was not angry –he would vent out his ire on me…. But stayed on…

Me: “Don’t you feel offended when such songs are belted out at some pandals?”
GB: “ Well…… I have my senses under control. My rat will not stray! So should all of my bhakts. Do not get distracted by songs or by gutkha ads at my pandal”



(The rat sitting obediently signifies control over your emotions and senses)




Me: “Indeed, Ganapati Bappa, you are so much in control and we need to learn from you”.



GB: “Then there was this song ‘Appu Cant Dance’…”

I was confused and did not know how to react!
GB: “I think they were trying to tease me because I can’t dance”

I remained Silent again. There was no place to hide from the Almighty!

GB: “They call an elephant ‘Appu’, isn’t it?”

I thought hard what was it that our Dear Ganapati Bappa was annoyed with? That Appu couldn’t dance? Oh wait a minute I thought…tried to get the words right. Hey, It was not ‘Appu’ but ‘Pappu’ I concluded!
Me: “That’s Pappu – not Appu, our beloved Bappa! The song talks of Pappu…”, I typed in excitedly.
GB: “Who Pappu?”
Me: “Some Pappu …maybe the Pappu, who passes the exams and Amitabh Bacchan dances and distributes Cadbury Chocolates… I don’t know…”
GB: “Oh, I thought they were trying to tease me and elephants that we cant dance and that my slimming down was not quite enough?”
Me: “Not at all, Bappa! Not at all”
GB; “Appu can dance! Who says Elephants can’t Dance? Haven’t you read the book by Louis V. Gerstner Jr?
Me: “Of course, Yes… that was in reference to the Global Mega Corporation, IBM.”
GB: “India is also being referred to as Elephant, just as China is being called ‘Dragon’”

I was amazed with His knowledge of current affairs, but it would be foolish to show my surprise that the God of Wisdom and Learning knows! He who had broken learnt to write with His broken tusk.... Of course, He would know!
GB: “Elephants can certainly dance… and India will dance… some years hence it will be time to write a book ‘The Elephant Does Dance’ and the elephant in this book would be referring to India!”

With these blessings from Ganapati Bappa for all Indians, I typed in my goodbye message.
Me: “Ganapati Bappa Morya! Pudhchya Varshi Lavkar Ya!”

[Marathi for ‘Ganapati Uncle be praised! Next year, do come early!’]
A customary way we Maharashtrian folk hail the Harbinger of good times, the Remover of obstacles, the Elephant-faced God so Dear to our hearts!
I continue to pray that mankind does take heed of Dear Ganapati Bappa's messages to us in the chat with me!


Bloggers Post Script:

This blog is the proud winner of the Third Prize in a contest run by LVS in BlogCatalog!
Three cheers for the Third Prize for my "Artickles" Blog!
Many thanks, LVS! We hope you continue to encourage bloggers like us by posting more competitions on BlogCatalog!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Wanna Be Somebody?

The complete unedited version of the article appeared in the Times of India dated 10th September 2008 for my blog readers below:

Many years ago, when asked by a friend’s acquaintance how he could get in touch with me, one presented one’s visiting card bearing office and residential addresses and phone numbers. He had a quick look at the card and, studying the coordinates detailed in my card, responded that it was of no good if it didn't bear my e-mail address!

My friend promptly informed me that times were when anybody who was 'somebody' would have an e-mail address. Not wanting to be 'nobody' for long, it was important to me to rush to the closest computer and plug in to the internet and get myself an e-mail address. Having become 'somebody' with a new personal identity, one sported it on one's visiting cards and even began to ask others if they had one.

It was my turn to ask others, "No e-mail address?" This tag of 'somebody' did not last long though. Soon enough, some chap frowned when he learnt that one did not have an instant messenger in place. "You've just got to download it for free", he informed me. In those days of bandwidth scarcity, it would be hours before the download would give me back my status of being somebody. Another friend would then taste the air of my superiority for not having one for himself.

I learnt soon enough though that 'somebody' had a short shelf life and moved quickly from one possession to another. My instant messenger did not have voice capability, background patterns, couldn’t exchange pictures until upgrades were installed and one could go back to becoming 'somebody' all over again. Soon the instant messenger had to follow me on my cellphone.

Recently, with my increased interest in blogging, it was time to go down that same path again.
“I blog, therefore I am” proclaimed bloggers at a city meet.
“Plain vanilla blog!”, said a fellow blogger.
“No counter? Live traffic indicator?” asked another.

Further questions from fellow bloggers (usually the younger ones)
“No subscription features like RSS?
( For the uninitiated, RSS is not the feed that the BJP subscribes to – it is the feed that readers subscribe to from Bloggers and website when updates are posted)

"No Feedburner?" Why would one want to burn your feed? one may wonder.
This is only a subscription to one's blogposts!
“No Blogrolls?”
“Not yet a member of communities like Digg, Del-icio-us, Technorati?”

Whew!!! So many things to drive traffic! Not for me - I cannot drive anything - I can only drive people mad!

If you ever tread this path, you would come across various terms like Labels (which incidentally are words describing the subject of your post so that they pop up on searching for specific subjects), Live Traffic indicators, Tagging and so on and so forth. Just as one would not know what a poke or a superpoke is until one opens an account in Facebook, Bloggers will learn this only as they go along on their blogging journey!

For a layperson, a separate Dictionary of Blogger’s terms is a need of the hour, I would imagine. It would be helpful if someone puts up the ABCs of Blogging on the internet. If I am entrusted with the task it would go as below :-
‘A’ for ‘Artickles’
‘B’ for ‘Blogs’
‘C’ for ‘Comments’….. and so on.

Nobody wants to remain Nobody - Everybody wants to be Somebody!
That is human nature! My pursuit to be ‘somebody’ in the blogging community continues. Alternating between being nobody and somebody, one wonders if it would be better to remain nobody? Or would my pursuit be much like the journey of the small boy, Santigo, in “The Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho, when all that mattered was the journey and not the destination?

After all my efforts to keep up with the Blogging Joneses, yielded no results - Neither significant Traffic by way of Blog-Hits nor Adsense revenue to justify my indulgence! I finally slumped into my chair - “Give me a life!” I sighed.

“How about ‘Second Life’?”, my daughter piped in opening up a whole new journey!

Some time later... maybe, I thought to my self.

The following lines came to my mind:-“We must not cease from exploring and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we began and to know the place for the first time”
– T.S.Eliot’s poem, ‘Little Gidding’ (the fourth of his ‘Four Quartets’)


I am thankful to Krishnan, a fellow blogger to share the below Lewis Carroll's quote in the Comments section:

"Now, here, you see, it takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place. If you want to get somewhere else, you must run at least twice as fast as that!" I have blogrolled Krishnan alongside!