Who is “in- Charge”. Me? No way!

By Murlidhar Varier - A Guest post on my blog...

Ours is a typical middle class nuclear family where I am the eldest and supposed to be in charge.I am responsible for sizable slice of the monthly income. All decisions pertaining to finance (other than routine expenses) needs to have my nod also.

As a result, I found myself in a so called high pedestal, where any decision that mattered needed my approval. I was happy.

One day, on further analysis of the decision making process, I realized that I am only a paper tiger.

Sure, I gave my assent to the replacement of the mixer-grinder and a new set of vessels for our kitchen. We set out to buy them. The first sign and shock of “who is in charge” dawned on me when the selection of the mixer & vessels were done overruling my suggestion.

“You keep quiet” was the refrain.

The second salvo was fired when my spouse’s name appeared on all the vessels (with that ear piercing electric pen) as she looked nonchalantly at me.

On our way back she kept chiding me for not handling the package properly.
Once home, I wanted to have a feel of our new acquisition, and I promptly proceeded to unpack the grinder.

“Stop!” She shouted, “Don’t spoil it on day one.”

Having lost the plot I retreated out of the kitchen. On my way out I picked the plastic carry bag that housed the grinder, intending to use it for the old files that were to be consigned to the loft.

“What are you doing?” She looked at me and exclaimed! With the same look that one gives when somebody is caught red handed, stealing. I replied that I wanted the bags for my files.

“I will give you another one” she said and scurried out of sight for a few seconds.
When she returned she triumphantly extended a carry bag,( which seen better days and with one of its ears torn) towards me and before I could argue, she lifted her hand to indicate that the matter was closed.

The number of carry bags she has squirreled away over the years will put a mid- sized mall to shame.

The same story repeated itself when I picked up one of the new vessels for preparing tea, one day. It was promptly eased out of my hold and before I could gather my wits, the old one was thrust into my hands. I will tell you when to start using the new one she said.

That day was the last I saw of the new vessels, for many months, till one day one of the vessels appeared like cubs going out for the first time in a zoo, for public viewing.

I thought I would be better off with my son but then again my power was short lived.

My son wanted an expensive smart phone and we debated over it for months till I could mobilize enough money to buy it. There was nothing wrong with his existing phone, but since I did not get any expensive toys when I was a child, I agreed to buy one for him, reluctantly.

After a lot of research on specification and price the phone was ordered with great enthusiasm. On the day it was supposed to arrive by courier my son told me in no uncertain terms that my job was to accept the package and keep it safely till it arrives.

“Don’t even think of opening it”, he said. My spouse was included in that part of the instruction and I felt better.

I tried to reason that the box may not contain what we ordered and to this he said that seller had a 48 hour return policy.

Soon the phone arrives and disappears into his room. Occasionally he will hand it to me as if doing me a favour. The plastic bag will be claimed by the rightful owner, leaving me just the credit card bills. At least there I am still the boss.

I reconciled to the situation telling myself that, it is my love towards them that lets them get away with this outrageous behavior and I shudder to test the veracity of my claim.

Moral of this piece:

It does not matter if you are the eldest, or it is your money, you own the house, or you are physically stronger the power centre lies elsewhere.
If there are more stories like these please share them. We could also form an association of the “Powerless Powerful”.

About the Author:
Murlidhar Varier writes a column on personal finance matters in the Golden Glow magazine. This is his first attempt at humour. Best wishes and hoping to read more humour pieces in the days to come.

Blogger's Post-Script
The ArTicKles Blog would be pleased to feature more guest posts. Do send in your contributions to g_mavinkurve [AT] hotmail [DOT] com to feature in this blog.

Fire Drill Fiasco

The recent incident in Bengaluru, in which a 25-year old woman, who lost her life in a mishap after having enthusiastically volunteered to participate in the mock fire drill organized by the local Fire Officer, shocked us! After watching the video-clip on a national television news channel, I tweeted thus:

@gopinathmm (me):
“ The B'luru Fire chief owes the people of India an explanation on the mock fire drill tragedy! Stupid execution, really - no net?”
@dhanyarajendran tweeted:
“Nalini lost her life for no reason! An eager citizen who wnted to participate in a mock drill! Who d hell were d firemen? Punish them

Many reacted strongly, demanding that the errant fire officer responsible for the accidental death of an eager citizen be sacked and some others said that it was a shameful incident for the Fire fighting squad in the city. Some even surmised that the rope that snapped may have been of lower quality due to the corrupt practices prevalent in public life.

Several questions come to mind in this regard:
1. Do even advanced countries have such fire drills in which an untrained volunteer is asked to descend to the ground from a higher floor using just a rope?
2. Would not such dangerous moves be demonstrated by Fire Brigade trained personnel first before asking volunteers to do it?
3. Has such an exercise been carried out before by any fire brigade in Bengaluru or any other city, successfully?
4. Wouldn’t the Fire Brigade use a rope ladder to descend in such a situation?
5. Wouldn’t there be a safety net in position below, in case the person slips during the mock drill?
6. Wouldn’t there be a written procedure and checklist to ensure that the rope is fastened properly to something firm (how firm is it?)-
7. What load the rope can carry/hold? Is the rope of adequate strength for the purpose?
8. Would it not have been better carried out from the first floor- rather than a higher floor? After all it was only a mock drill!

There might be more! I am sure these points will come up in the investigation that the Fire Chief at the helm of affairs would look into and set things in order.

The Fire Brigade personnel and officers are the real heroes in our society and have saved the lives of several citizens from imminent death in life-threatening situations, by risking their own lives. The kind of risks that the fire-fighting personnel face are un-imaginable and we owe it to them that they be equipped with proper fire-fighting gears that function when calamity comes calling! It is imperative therefore, that the best quality material is purchased without compromising standards

Needless to say, Corrupt practices compromising on quality are intolerable!

While mock drills are certainly needed, the manner in which they are conducted ought to be a well-thought out process, in which the demonstrators are well-trained in fire-fighting, evacuation skills before they are put on display before the general public! Personnel, that are well-trained to cope with emergecies, in offices, hospitals, malls, auditoriums and several such public places, are indeed the need of the hour. The AMRI hospital fire would have been better handled by their staff, had they been trained how to handle an evacuation by fire brigade officials.

More important is the aspect of prevention! How many public places are audited for safety? How many pass muster? Why don’t we make it mandatory for all public places to prominently display the latest safety audit reports/ratings for public information? Reports and ratings given honestly, of course! So that we know how safe we are when we enter them?

Would we be asking for too much?

Cronyism and Pseudo-Democracy

Although it has been several decades since kings ruled our people, feudalism is prevalent in many parts of our society, albeit disguised as democracies. Some people think that feudalism is a trait that cannot be removed from the deep-rooted mindset of the masses in a span of just 2 or 3 generations. Education, which apparently seemed to be the only remedy to change our thinking, failed to do the trick too. Educated people are not necessarily adept at ‘thinking through’ current developments in today's times. Not surprising at all! Education never taught us to think, decide, be prudent with money matters or deal with bullies in every walk of life – all of which is so essential to live a reasonably comfortable life. Dynasties and Rajas will continue to rule us eternally.

In the recent 2G telecom plunder episode, dynasties and Rajas could take a billion people for a royal ride. Rulers of the states of our country are grooming their sons (daughters, nephews, etc) to take over the reins by joining politics and getting ‘democratically elected’, so that the license to plunder remains within their clan for several generations to come. Gullible voters don’t seem to mind this one bit! If the father was a great leader, so would his progeny, they all seem to think. With the costs of contesting elections being ridiculously high, who can afford to field one’s son, except, of course the well-heeled - and a politician himself? With such entry barriers to keep well-intentioned reformers out of the election fray, this whole exercise of spending money on election campaigning has ensured that elected members will work to get adequate ‘returns’ on their ‘investments’.

Promises are quickly forgotten and one gets down to serious business! It is payback time, folks, and the cookie jars are all stocked up for the privileged few who can dig into them. “Cookie jars?”, you may ask. The average ‘educated’ man has not learnt to spot a ‘cookie jar’ in his school or college. Mines, land, special economic zones, spectrum, projects, mega-events, licences – there are plenty of them for the asking. Ambitious Corporate houses, who are the major funding bodies at the time of elections too only too impatient to get manifold ‘returns’ on their investment. Payback time, they tell the parties supported by them, as returns come in the form of government sops handed out to their industries and businesses – larger profits mean higher bonuses, don’t they? It is a Wink-Wink situation!

And what does the average man on the street get? Promises, some Crony Capitalism, a Crony Government, a Pseudo-Democracy, great excitement due to heightened uncertainty – and, of course, a large bill (read: higher taxes) for the excesses committed by the elected and the venturesome! The educated get newspaper editorials, some interesting television debates that appeal to their intellect – that’s about it. A heavy price to pay (read: taxes) for some cheap thrills. With the SC cancelling 2G licences, the Government is certain to raise money through auctions. Good for us, but the common man would like to know how and when will the looted moneys from several scams be recovered from the perpetrators? No wonder, the world is simmering with anger! But those at the cookie jars have gotten too deep inside it, to be able to listen to the din outside.

Just a pseudo-post by a pseudo-blogger hoping to pseudo-tickle the readers, for a change!

Book Review - '1/7 Bondel Road' by Gautam Benegal

Published in 2011 by Wisdom Tree
ISBN: 978-81-8328-181-2
Genre: Fiction / Short Stories

Each of us would have had some childhood experiences that we come out with in our conversations in life or when opportunity presents itself and nudges you down memory lane, feel the nostalgia take charge of ourselves. But if we were to ask ourselves is there some instance we would like to narrate, maybe we would ask ourselves whether any of our childhood experiences were really worthy of being a good tale for someone to relish? We would look for rare, extraordinary instances that may astound readers or listeners – and perhaps sulk, citing destiny not being kind enough to have conferred us with such exciting out-of-the-world instances, as some others have been!

But this may not be everyone’s predicament. Writers like Gautam Benegal would recount his childhood days and tell us the story of Tutul and his friends all of 9 and 10 years of age, living in a paara in Calcutta in the 70’s and 80’s, with the panache of a master storyteller. That is what he did in “1/7, Bondel Road” published recently by Wisdom Tree which offers 10 brilliantly sketched vignettes of those growing up years. There is nothing unusual or spectacular about the stories that have been told, except the manner in which they have been told – unarming simplicity, mischievous charm, liberal sprinkling of humour embellish the narrative in this engrossing collection of endearing short stories. One wishes they would just go on - surely, Tutul had experienced more, that the author has yet to tell!?!

Tutul, the protagonist of the stories, has Bhultu, Anondo, Shushanto as his playmates joining in a game of badminton, cricket or football. While one is brought up in a household struggling to make ends meet, another enjoys the pleasures of electronic remote controlled toy cars, comics and books that his father could really buy! The different backgrounds and the consequential cracks in the friendly relationships beckons Tutul’s skills to come to the fore as he is found balancing differences between his friends. One would wonder if a career in international diplomacy was just the right thing for young Tutul?! But then, he had errands to run, important tasks thrust upon him to ..er.. forget and rescue the hungry households living in his locality during a particularly bad monsoon, in which torrential rains ravaged the city Calcutta, before he could take on countries.

Tutul’s early fondness for paintings and the encouragement from friends’ parents followed up by a humorous account of his first-ever effort to hold a private painting exhibition in his very home, (on the sly, of course), tells the reader of the difficulties of finding such creatures as ‘interested patrons’. The story of the cyclist trying to raise funds for his ailing son and the reactions of the folks living in his neighbourhood then captures the lives we live even today – causes, fund-raiser events, supporters, critics, controversies, - they all remain, while the only thing that changes is the means – the humble cycle gives way to social media pages!

The television episode dealt with in immaculate detail of hardware and machinations pertaining to those days in the '70s, when ‘Catching the signal’ was both art and science. A thoroughly enjoyable piece, that I felt was enacted before me, as I read it! It also reminded me of the early days when TV was a novelty and how hundreds of us would huddle into a single room in Mumbai…but then that would have to be another story for another post! Another enjoyable story is the prank young Tutul plays on his co-passengers, while on a train journey – an ex-tempore gag, while getting all the attention and stealing the limelight for sure! Even the recent flash-mobs breaking into a Kolaveri-dance would pale in front of this one!

This post is about 1/7, Bondel Road – the book - a must read for one and all – for its simple narrative style. It is not just about Calcutta or the ‘70s it is talking about – it is about growing up. Don’t we all go through this phase of life, without an exception? Gautam Benegal, a writer, National Award winning animation film maker, artist and cartoonist, would surely have more interesting episodes to share with us. His debut book of short stories leaves the reader wanting more…

Rating: 4.5 / 5

IWOTY 2011 Nominations

Ever since your favorite blog, The ArTicKles Blog, has been launched (in April 2008), it has regularly kept its readers informed about the Word Of The Year (WOTY) declared by Oxford Dictionaries, Global Language Monitor (GLM) and the American Dialectic Society (ADS).

The links to these posts are here, in case you have missed them or wish to refresh your memory.
WOTY 2008

WOTY 2009

WOTY 2010 and IWOTY 2010

In the post announcing WOTY 2009, a question was posed to the readers of this blog thus:
“Indians should have their own WOTY! What do you have to say?”

In the very next year, while announcing WOTY 2010, I invited some suggestions and posted them as worthy candidates for IWOTY 2010. The following words featured in the competition: Scam, ScamRaja, ScamRajya, Spectrum Raja, Tainted, Corruption. The Scam –related words dominated the polls, as was expected. As you would observe the words suggested by readers is a reflection of the times we live in. Future generations could study their history of the present times by studying the WOTYs! Psst: Yes we too will be history some day!

NOMINATIONS FOR IWOTY 2011

This year the following words have been suggested by enthusiastic readers of the ArTicKles Blog (and some are my own wild imagination) :-

1. Anna

Anna Hazare’s first name - Anna - Just a word? I am sure Anna is not just a word, but a phenomenon that 2011 witnessed. The “Anna movement” ; the “Team Anna”; the “Anna factor”’ the “Anna phenomenon” was the much talked about subject by the print media as much as TV coverage of the events that Anna’s movement organized in several parts of the country. Newspaper editorials and opinion pieces may have debated his manner of protests being methods of “arm-twisting” and argued about the concept of the Lokpal being flawed in a democratic republic, but the people of India found the basic movement against corruption just the right course of action to deal with the widespread malaise that is eating into the fabric of our nation. Whether the movement will result in a strong Lokpal Bill or not, however important, one cannot deny the awareness that Anna spread about the need to combat corruption in our lives in all its manifest forms.

2. Annagiri – This derivative form of ‘Anna’ would perhaps be another worthy candidate. It is now rampantly practiced by the common man donning “I am Anna” caps and taking up cudgels with the corrupt powers-that-be. Akin to the “Gandhigiri” which is not exactly following the Mahatma’s principles, but really just adopting the methods demonstrated by Munnabhai in the cinematographic depiction of the Mahatma, - that of offering flowers and winning hearts to get redressal to grievances, Annagiri would turn out to take up a strong, determined stand against those in public service, who later turn despotic in their stance, once elected to the chair.

3. Kolaveri – A tamil word that every school-going child has heard about thanks to the song “Why this kolaveri di?” sung by Rajnikant’s son-in-law, Dhanush and featured by all TV News channels. They told us that It means “murderous rage”. Although the ‘Tanglish’ song is basically a drunken lament of the heart-broken young boy as he asks his ex-girl friend a question that is now on the minds of all leaders of the world today “Why this murderous rage?” In fact without the “kolaveri” emotion felt by millions in the middle east, the “Arab Spring” or the “Occupy Wall Street” movements would not have been much to talk about. There is kolaveri doing the rounds of the globe and the world would see how it fits into the global scenario – Tamil heartbroken soup boy singing in Tanglish is not a frame that can hold it within or contain – it has gone viral as it rightfully deserves! This murderous rage has dislodged despots, changed regimes and will probably serve the masses well by keeping the rulers in every country in check of their excesses.

4. Lokpal – The perceived panacea for the ills of corruption and the proposed Ombudsman with a larger than life role being sought by Civil Society is another worthy candidate for IWOTY 2011. The Lokpal will soon enter lexicons, for sure, as there is no proper equivalent word in the English language. Whether we will have one or even if we have one, will it be strong enough to serve its purpose, is another matter altogether!

5. Anshun - Protests have been the theme of Year 2011 and India was not to be left behind. Anna Hazare. Whether this word will become popular or not, one cannot be sure, but the protests that one witnessed in 2011 do characterize the year 2011 very well. No wonder, the Time magazine has announced the Person Of The Year 2011 as “The Protestor”!

6. Slaptivism n. activism by slapping [slap + activism] – This form of activism was resorted to by an Indian youth recently when he slapped Sharad Pawar to vent his frustration on corruption and uncontrolled food inflation. We have come a long way from being ‘slacktivists’ - slack armchair activists, who click on causes pages or online petitions to protest. We have also seen ‘hacktivists’ like Julian Assange who hacked into computers and exposed (and thereby embarrassed) governments by revealing secret pacts proving ulterior motives. We also witnessed legal activism in India, Dr Subramaniam Swamy’s crusade in courts to fix corruption using existing laws. Implementing laws has always been the real hurdle in fixing the corrupt – laws may need to be changed, but without all these various forms of activisms, the Lokpal Bill or any other law will do little by itself.

7. Sibal v. to remove offensive content from social networking sites
Also - Siballed – offensive content removed by Government by Sibal’s laws’
Also -- Siballing - the act of removal of offensive content ~

This diktat from Kapil Sibal was greeted by dollops of kolaveri from the aam admi! Champions of the ‘Free speech’ cause fired salvos on their blogs and challenged the government and debates followed as celebrities who are also the targets of hate posts, abusive language and photo-shopped images supported some kind of action against such malicious posts and such offenders who attack them in public platforms.

8. Civil Society – This was another much talked about phrase in 2011. The fact that the government did engage with unelected, self-appointed campaigners with a cause became the bone of contention. “Representatives of ‘civil society’”, was a term used to justify discussions with a view to bring a stringent law through debates. Although the government had been always posting proposed draft laws in public domain, inviting suggestions from NGOs, public/industry bodies in the past, this was an unusual engagement with ‘civil society’. It is hoped that ‘civil society’ plays a larger role in policy formulations in a participative democracy in future.


9. There are some more words suggested by subscribers to my blog, such as ‘Incorrigible India’, ‘Jokepal’, ‘2ji’, ‘aggrandisement’ etc. that some of you have suggested that deserve mentions.

From the scam-related words in 2010, we have moved on to protest-related words in 2011!

Is there any Indian word for too much debate and scant action? We must have one! So maybe we can hope for something to look forward to in 2012. Will we have a Lokpal in 2012, one wonders?

WOTY 2011 - and IWOTY?

As the year draws to a close, one cannot help but pause in thought, spare a few moments to reflect upon all the happenings of the year that slips into the past. How the year 2011 treated you would largely determine whether you loved it or loathed it.

“Squeezed middle” is the Oxford Dictionaries Word of the Year 2011.

Generally it has been an year of protests across continents - protest against crony capitalism and the economic cruelty of the 1% against the “other 99%” by innovating financial products designed to unjustly enrich the wealthy, while handing out a raw deal to the ‘squeezed middle’. While squeezed middle is British Labour Party leader Ed Miliband's term for those seen as bearing the brunt of government tax burdens while having very little to pay it off.

“Occupy” is Global Language Monitor WOTY 2011

The “Occupy Wall Street” movement along with the occupied territories of Iraq and Afghanistan helped “occupy” pitch for top spot in the Global Language Monitor’s exercise this year.

‘Arab Spring’ was voted as the Phrase off the Year 2011 by Oxford Dictionaries

In North Africa and the middle eastern countries, the year witnessed unrest of the masses against complacent, vain, self-serving leaders exploiting them in every conceivable manner for decades. What began as an uprising in Tunisia in December 2010, later spread as the Jasmine revolution to other countries in the region and is now collectively termed as the ‘Arab Spring’ by the western countries. Power-drunk despots, who had unleashed their tyranny on their subjects for several decades, were dislodged from their thrones as public sentiment turned against them in 2011 after bearing the brunt of their atrocities.

The other words that also-ran in the race to the top may be seen in the links below;

Oxford Dictionaries shortlist of words for WOTY 2011

Global Language Monitor’s WOTY 2011

As has been expressed by the ArTIcKles Blog, we Indians ought to choose our own Word of the Year the Indian Word Of The Year (IWOTY).

What do you think the Indian Word of the Year 2011 be? Do suggest words for IWOTY 2011 - leave your comment in this blogpost.

Retailing our woes

When our elected parliamentarians holds the nation to ransom as they bicker on some or the other issue by preventing the house from functioning in its core business of discussing and passing bills that are the dire need of its citizens, one would think that any bill passed by the Government in such times would be received with a thunderous applause. But that has not been our experience recently. The FDI in multi-brand retail has been quashed by opposition from left-wing political parties, who see more harm to our people than good. The argument is that they will finish the kirana-wallas (mom-and-pop stores) and then dictate their prices to the small farmers and exploit them! Those who support FDI in multi-brand retail argue that the large food chain specialists will offer better prices to farmers, invest in better cold-storage chains and yet offer consumers a better deal than the present market mechanism does.

Indian traders have, for several decades, dictated terms to small farmers and producers, fleeced middle class consumers by flouting every regulation meant to protect them and have unjustly enriched themselves all along. Several success stories of small-time retailers turning into big-time business houses with companies now listed on bourses get featured regularly in the media. Yet, it was these very retailers that got bailed out by opposing the FDI proposal in multi-brand retail! Basically, organized global retailers of the kinds of Walmart and Carrefour lost out – at least for the moment.

The young prince of the Congress party has been telling our farmers how they had been deprived of an opportunity to get better prices from these charmed global giants and would continue to suffer from the handouts from local traders due to the opposition to the proposed FDI.

What one ought to ask is this: Weren’t the various malls that were set up by Indian entrepreneurs, the likes of Big Bazaar, Subhiksha, More, Reliance Fresh and several others – which were also supposed to cut out the middleman from the chain and offer better times for producers and consumers from their efficient supply chain capabilities – supposed to do exactly this? But they did not prevent farmer suicides or prevent the exploitation of the small producers, did they? So how is it that bigger global players would do what the local entrepreneurs fail to? If conditions of investment in cold-chains and better supply chain facilities would be enforced for FDI investors, wouldn’t the same conditions imposed on domestic players have not been the right way to go? Would we not have seen better infrastructure if these conditions had been in place for local large-format retailers already?

The magic potion of multi-brand retail revolution having been thwarted, the government hurriedly passed the Food Security Bill! The succour to our hungry millions, it would seem. But the recent introduction of the Food Security Bill has been criticized in the press for several shortcomings and significantly for the huge burden [estimated to be Rs. 5,45,000 Crores] on the ex-chequer at a time when the fiscal deficit already poses an insurmountable challenge for the government to cope with. Deficit aside, the poor delivery mechanisms that our previous programs prompt us to be skeptical of the basic purpose of any food security bill – to ensure every citizen gets his two square meals every day! Will he? Or will some politician now go around and tell the hungry that the pseudo intellectuals in our society opposed the FSB and deprived you of your rightful meal today, that we sought to deliver?

One cant but admire the work of various NGOs committed to feed the hungry - they dont wait for the government to pass a piece of legislation!