Palin Talk

“Sprite bujhaye only pyaas! Seedhi Baat - No Bakwas” claimed ads of Sprite, a soft drink in India. Hindi for ‘Sprite only quenches thirst - Plain Talk No hogwash’. This revolutionary soft drink advertisement promoted plain talk more than the drink itself, one would imagine. I enjoyed this take on the tall claims made by competitors through their ad campaigns and liked the refreshing ad as much as the refreshing soft drink and the refreshing new idea of plain talk.

But alas, even this soft drink has stopped quenching only thirst and has started “ Sprite Express - Ghumo, Ghumao!” Who needs a soft drink to Ghumo Ghumao? Is it not the prerogative of our local politicians to do that? Advertisements can baffle as much as they can entertain.

If you havent seen the ad, Watch the Video here.

You may be familiar with the surrogate ads of hard-hitting liquor drinks, which are otherwise not allowed to walk down the advertisement ramps unless they disguise themselves to be some music cassette or rock band or some holiday package,apple juice or life-saving nectar. So they appear in a tribal costume dancing to the taal (beat) of drums and making Taal Claims of their products-parading-incognito. Tall Claims, I mean.

Of late, ad campaigns have been hijacked by competitors. As in a recent campaign that had attempted to build suspense and curiosity by declaring “See you at Home Soon”, without revealing the product being advertised. BIG Rivals being a BIG time Industry house was also BIG time into corporate spying. Reliance BIG hijacked their theme by advertising their product was at home with all their BIG features to boast of. Everything about the product would be BIG, one was convinced. We shall see a BIG shake-out in the DTH (Direct-to-Home) TV business. The consumer must also be prepared for BIG discounts and some BIG disappointments if promises are not kept or services are not upto their BIG expectations.

But hijacking is not restricted to advertisements. Political parties are now claiming that their hard hitting manifestos (or the very purpose of their existence) are also prey to hijacking. The ‘original’ tiger cub, Uddhav says so in an interview to the Mumbai Mirror, recently. He says it is a remake like Sholay!

But hasn’t Raj roared louder, hogged prime-time national channels and front pages of national newspapers with the very same agenda? Has he not ushered in the competition to the claim for the real Grand Savior of Marathi (hereafter referred to as GSM)? One cannot rule out more claimants of GSM from all parties present and future in the times to come!

Now hold it! I cannot be hijacking my blogpost from being a humor blog to a political blog and speculate on who the GSM would be and have fellow bloggers committed to political blogs fretting and fuming for infringing into their domain and let down my readers who wait for their regular dose of rib-tickling humor. I cannot let this happen. It’s my blog! I may not know who owns Mumbai, but I certainly know who owns this blog - Me!

So let me share a futuristic joke I heard from a chaste Marathi Manoos, while travelling in a BEST Bus yesterday , which goes thus (translated from Marathi) :-
“Time came when the Grand Savior of Marathi (GSM) had become very powerful and no foreign investment could be made without his blessing. The head honchos of several foreign companies lined up at His office. One such foreign industrialist invited him out to a Multi-Star Hotel for Lunch. This MNC hotel served exotic food from Italy, Bangkok, Korea, Lebanon, Japan and Singapore. Sigh, but none from Kolhapur. When asked what he would have, GSM promptly replied in Marathi, “Kombdi”. The Chef, an enlightened soul, had known of the primary rule of learning Marathi equivalents to dish it out in Marathi and thankfully knew that “Kombdi” meant Chicken.

When the dish arrived, GSM found some extraneous meat other than the “Kombdi” in his dish! Having heard of the habits of over-zealous Far-easterners of adding some forbidden meats as garnishing, he declared further:
“Fakkta Kombdi!”

The poor chef had not heard of this before and went shouting into the kitchen repeating what he had uttered! The Sous Chef, also a foreigner, replied, “I have killed it, removed its feathers, cleaned it and also grilled it thoroughly.
How in hell do I now F**K THE KOMBDI?”

Moral of the Story: If you want to be in Maharashtra, learn proper Marathi, guys!

After this incident, would the mighty GSM change his long standing slogan “Fakkta Marathi”, meaning “Only Marathi!”, to protect its pride from the wild mis-interpretation of outsiders? One wonders.

If this post is about slogans, adlines, hijack, change, advertising, political manifestos,why is this post titled “Palin Talk” if it has nothing to do with Sarah Palin? Is this another hijack? No, sorry, it is only a typo. It should have been ‘Plain Talk'. Like ‘Palin Dosa’ served in a Mysore Restaurant - the board should have been saying ‘Plain Dosa’. If you want foreign tourists to come visiting, learn what they would like to have! I just learnt from them.

Seeing is Believing: Palin Dosa Board
(Times of India Page 7 dated 02.11.2008)


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