Our Furrst Budday!

On 10th April 2009, The ArTicKles Blog completes one year!

It's our Fursst Budday! Let us celebrate!
Get the Balloons, the solitary candle and the Cake....







Thanks to all the blog readers, fellow bloggers, commenters - to each and every one of you, without whom we wouldnt have been able to make this journey together!

- The Editorial Team (consisting of my mouse, keyboard, right index finger)
- The Production Team (consisting of my laptop, my sofa, my internet connection, google.com, blogger.com, hotmail.com)
- The Creative Team (my shoes, the pot-holed roads, the politicians, the newsreaders and just about anyone who gives me an idea)

My Thinking Shoes!

If you have been a regular reader of this blog, you would know that most of my blog posts have been a result of ideas that come to me when I am on my brisk morning walk. Most people put on their thinking hats, whenever they need to.

Well, I put on my thinking shoes. An old pair of Reebok Sports shoes, which I got free with my Orange SIM Card, and still going strong.

Of late, I observe that my shoes are not functioning properly. No, it is not that I cannot walk properly or that the shoes are tearing. The pair has really lasted quite a long time. “Orange” has become “Hutch” and “Hutch” has become “Vodafone”, but these faithful shoes have been serving me all along. The trouble is that I am not getting any good ideas during my long brisk walks these days.

During one of my walks, I was just wondering how this amazing accessory, meant to cover my bare feet, could give me such wonderful ideas? Positioned at the other extreme in relation to my skull (my cranial box), this pair, which cannot be called downtrodden, helps me think “out of the box”. The cranial box, that is.

I have never ever treated my pair of shoes as “just a pair of shoes”. Never! In fact, whenever the shoelaces come off on their own during my morning walks, I have patiently tied them back lovingly, without getting upset, without a whimper. Though a thought of requesting my researcher-friend to do some work to figure out how these shoes manage to untie the laces on their own did cross my mind at times. But then since I got this idea while on my walk, I can proudly attribute it to this faithful pair trudging along with me.

If you thought this awesome footwear only protected my feet from the heat, stones and dust on the road, you’re wrong! So why then have my shoes stopped helping me come up with some good ideas for the next blog post? I wondered.

Today morning, when my shoelaces came off on their own, I bent down and while I tied them back, had a small little chat with my shoes.

“Wassup, guys? Why so glum?”, I began the conversation.
“Who are we and who really cares?”, they replied as though they knew this question was coming up.
“Hey, I have always treated you with great respect!”
“But nobody know us. Look at some of the other shoes - they are appearing on Prime Time TV”
“For all the wrong reasons, aren’t they?”

“Wrong reasons? They have been more effective than all the editorial columns and the combined fury of the opinion columnists put together! They have been the most effective instruments of getting the world’s attention to issues that get brushed aside inspite of the hundreds of write-ups and zillions of blog posts arguing this way and the other”

“You’re right, 'effective' they certainly have been – but then, you should be proud that finally your ilk have braved against all odds from the lowly position you held in society – near the feet, that is - you have been flung ..er.. sorry, raised to greater heights! You now rub shoulders with Cabinet Ministers. You are going places and leaving a footprint all over the world. People are left wondering Shoe's next?”

“Of course, we are proud of them, celebrity shoes! But what about us? We have been silently contributing to your blog and making several thousands…er ..or is it just dozens?... laugh. But we don’t get the slightest credit for it, not even a mention in your blog!”

“But you have never sulked in this way before, now who gave you this stupid idea?”

“Well, when we were kept in the shoe-rack of the Ganapati temple yesterday whilst you were praying to the Almighty, all the other shoes and chappals were talking about their prospects at being hurled at somebody or the other. Their folks hate someone or the other and keep talking about wanting to settle scores one politician or the other on an opportune day. When they asked us about our prospects - oh, how we had to confide our pitiable state because you don’t ever hate any politician or get mad at any public figure. In fact we told them you avoid them like the plague - that at best you would take potshots at them on his blog - our chances to worldwide popularity is really bleak to say the least”

“If popularity is all you are seeking, I promise you I will write about you in my next post, now cheer up!”, I concluded.

Hopefully, my shoes will be happy with this post and continue to support this blog as always!

Blogger’s Postscript: Read my First post on the ArTicKles Blog here and take this quiz.
Quiz: What must we do on 10th April 2009?

The mystery of the scary metallic sound

The Mystery of the Scary Metallic Sound

By Supriya Mavinkurve

Finally, we boarded the Udyan Express at Mumbai to attend a wedding ceremony in Bangalore. A quick survey of the co-passenger revealed that my journey would be peaceful, without the usual chaos caused by crying children or wailing infants through the night, as we did not catch sight of any kid around. None of the adults were chattering away excitedly, as one normally expects in a long-distance train journey. The train rattled away on its tracks, swaying merrily as it customarily does.

The lights went off, one after the other, and soon it was dark enough to sleep. It was a tiring day for me – waking up early to pack-up; trying to complete my college assignments at hand; sending those last minute emails; posting Orkut messages and of course, leaving well in time to reach the railway station. We had had an early dinner as the train leaves at 8 pm in the evening. My weary eyes closed, but my ears continued to listen to the rattling sound of the train. I tossed and turned, but my ears would not allow me to sleep peacefully.

Then, I heard this strange sound – of some electric saw drilling through solid metal! Was someone cutting open the window to get in? I looked out of the window. Nothing unusual, only darkness and some stray light reflecting on the dark silhouettes of trees, whizzing past. My ears may be playing a trick on me, I thought. I tried to catch up on my much-needed forty winks, but it was, this mysterious sound again, louder and sharper, this time around. Was there someone on the roof trying to cut it apart and get in? Was a terrorist at work here? Or a dacoit? We had not heard of dacoits in this region, but who knows, I wondered. Or was it just a technician trying to fix something in the toilet, which was only a couple of berths away?

Every one else seemed to have logged off for the day. Was it worth waking up someone, maybe my Mom? I couldn’t possibly go off to sleep, when there could be an attack any moment, could I? I peered into the darkness and waited to see if the ‘electric-saw-cutting-into-metal’ sound would be heard again. After all, it could just have been a figment of my imagination! Then it came again - louder and shriller, cutting deeper, from across the opposite berth. Was this large sized guy sleeping across me up to some mischief, pretending to sleep? I picked up my air-filled pillow up as a shield and shook my hands violently, as though staving off an offender. The offender took no notice of the waved pillow and the sound became shriller, reached the crescendo, and then punctured off like a gush of air escaping from a deflated tire.

Oh, he had just been snoring!!!

Blogger's Post-Script: Encouraged by the response to her first contribution to my blog, Supriya has written another one which i am sharing with you all. Thanks, Supriya!

The Only Choice

It wouldn’t be surprising if one considered us to be the living dead for not taking steps to enroll oneself, so that we can exercise our voting right. The jaagore campaign and the new “Shut Up and Vote” song may be just the right tune to spur the Indian youth into action this time around. After all, that is our only choice to bring about the desired change in this organized mess, which incidentally is also the largest democracy in the world.
It is another matter that we have several parties deploying paid volunteers for party work. With elections coming up, one always witnesses allegations and counter-allegations, mud-slinging, muck-raking at all time highs. In short, the state of controlled chaos gets worse, and things get pretty ugly during election times.

It is also that time of the year when news channels beam our political leaders deliver high-pitch speeches aimed to hit opponents below the belt, figuratively speaking. Election analysts, or (Psephologists, as they are called), would have a field day providing the low-down on high-scoring candidates. You may think this is old news, but the heated discussions and debates on national channels will get shriller and shriller until you begin to love the sound of silence. I gather the election commissioner has debarred channels from airing exit polls, as they could influence the decision of voters, especially considering that the polls are scheduled in four phases across the length and breadth of our country.

These “experts” had been conducting such exit polls during past elections and portraying their findings as representing exact estimates of the results, ignoring the constant variable feature of such a narrow exercise based on insufficient sample size and unreliable responses from voters, who may act naturally, but mislead one and all. There being no obligation on the part of the surveyed individual to indicate truthfully the candidate of his choice. This uncertainty and unreliability of such an exercise has been the constant variable in such exercises, which have been purposefully ignored by the clever fools peddling poll-time excitement for viewers, with an eye on TRP, of course.

With our neighbouring countries are on the brink of a civil war, we may not need the thrill of a reality shows if action on this front hots up. I could go on pointlessly this way… but what am I getting at? Why am I writing about election time when that is not my forte?

Well, this post is about Oxymorons!

Oxymoron is not a moron put on oxygen,
Oxymoron is when contradicting words combine to form a meaningful phrase or term

For example,
1. Virtual reality
2. Original copy
3. Jumbo shrimp
4. Bitter sweet
5. Plastic glasses
6. Wooden iron
7. Same difference

I could have simply listed all these oxymorons, but it is an open secret that I hate lists! I am terribly pleased to inform you that I have written articles demonstrating the use of color phrases in the same way. I love to demonstrate usage by constructing sentences which actually make sense!

Whatnonsanz making sense? Moronic or Oxymoronic?
If honest lawyer is listed as an oxymoron, now then does clean politics deserve a mention too?

More Oxymorons listed here

And here.

Blogger’s Post-Script: I hope ke aapko mera post thoda bahut pasand aaya ho. My favourite Hindi oxymoron is “thoda bahut”!

A couple of tags

My friends in blogosphere have been tagging me, off and on. While I may not have been doing justice to all these tags, I am sure they will pardon me for not posting my tags on time (and sometimes not at all).

What is Tagging?
For the uninitiated, this blogging phenomenon called “tagging” is like an assignment your child’s school has assigned to your child and the whole family gets down to do! The similarity ends there – in this case I’ve got to do it all by myself and it is assigned by a fellow blogger to you and it is often fun to read and post a tag! So, as you see, there are more dissimilarities than similarities - but an assignment it is, all the same!

I must also thank all those who expect my tags to give a funny, humorous twist to the subject/assignment. Thank you for knowing my limitations!

Priyank's Pi day Tag
Priyank Thatte, , whom I know to be a backpacker, mountaineer, global travel writer, blogger, warm and nice person has tagged me this time around. For one, I never knew Priyank was a mathematics enthusiast. The first and only time I met him was at a bloggers meet, where amongst hundreds of bloggers assembled there, he was the only blogger whom I could bond with easily. Of course, apart from my old buddy finance wizard, a storyteller, (who staked his claim to write nonsense too); and another widely read, wide-eyed blogger, whom I could bond with immediately.

Priyank wants me to “write a humorous post about people doing weird things”. Since I couldn’t actually figure out what I had to do, I read the post over and over again and finally decided to have my IQ checked. Priyank was right -I never knew he could mathematically guess ……that my IQ would be Pi!

My IQ = 3.14159…..

Had my IQ been less than the value of Pi, I am told, I could have contested the oncoming elections. But such privileges are not for me!

As if we had less number of “days” to celebrate, Priyank came up with the Square Root day on 03.03.09! Read his post here.

And then we are told we need to observe Pi day on 14th March! Read his Pi day Pie post here.

Priyank, thanks for tagging me! I enjoyed doing this one! Now that I have discovered the mathematical incline in you, I guess this is how your clock would look like.


Second Tag from Sahaja
Now coming to my second tag, Sahaja has tagged me - I am required to post the 6th photograph from my 6th Photo Folder So here goes:


Some authorities insisted on the evidence of my claim to be the original inspiration of Mr. Bean. And you thought I have forgotten all about my claim to be the original inspiration of Mr. Bean! You will understand, if you read this post!

My earlier tag on Feminism
For those of you who have not read my post “Tagged on Feminism”, I request you to read it now!

My aunt writes for tickledbylife website!

Mrs. Shanta Madiman is my wonderful aunt, who had been so regular in writing letters to us ever since I was in school. Always looking for a reason to appreciate every small success of ours as we grew up, Shanti Mami's (as I called her) letter would arrive with loads of praise, a word of advice, and always a thought or two about our well-being - and whatever she would write, would be straight from her heart! I am sure all my cousins would agree with me how we would eagerly look forward to receiving a letter from her. Even in her old age, she continues to write, inspite of a considerable pain, whenever an occasion demands.

Last week when I visited them, she handed over a hand written article, with a request to improve it and have it published wherever suitable. I found the article interesting and thought-provoking, so I worked on it to tweak it just a little bit here and there and submitted it to the reputed website, Tickled by life.

Do read the article here!,

Blogger's Post-script

I would like to share another very interesting post about Superbrain Yoga, that I came across in Sahasi's Blog, Discover the world, which you may read here.

Vijay Ho!

When James Otis decided to sell Mahatma Gandhi’s belongings through a global auction in New York, the Indian Government woke up to the fact that Gandhiji’s belongings couldn’t be sold in such a blatantly materialistic manner. After all, we owed it to the father figure of our country, or even to his soul, to prevent such a demeaning act that showed scant respect for our country and our great leaders. Materials matter, values are immaterial these days.

So after pressing the snooze button on the alarm clock numerous time, our government woke up and began their efforts to get back our country’s heritage, by hook or crook. Or by Sant or Vijay, can we say? Without drawing parallels, of course. The wealthy Sant Chatwal offered to bring back the memorabilia to the place it belonged. But the spirited soul, who has never faced liquidity problems, being always well-stocked with the right kind of spirited liquids, entered the race to “serve our country”. Needless to say, like his race horses, he beat Sant to the finishing line.

Finally, when the liquor baron, pulled off this act and bought the articles rightfully belonging to our country, our countrymen gathered at the bar – not the one associated with the law, as Gandhiji would have done in his young age – the one which has served them with the spirited liquid day in and day out, except on dry days, of course – a place, where Gandhiji would never have tread - and truly celebrated Vijay Mallya's success by raising a toast to his success an drinking to his wealthy future.

You can imagine the millions of faithful citizens, who would have done this small drunken jig and exclaimed, “Vijay Ho!” Even those who are faithful to their “country” (as in “country liquor”, as they call the local brew or arrack), but cannot afford the IMFL, would have joined in this small little drunken jig and the "Vijay Ho!" chant, for good measure.

I received an SMS from a friend Ashwin, which goes, “Gandhiji hated liquor and did his bit to contain its sales. It is ironic that a liquor baron was instrumental in buying his memorabilia back for India”. Thanks, Ashwin! We have to give it to Vijay Mallya! He deserves each of those drunken jigs and lots of “Vijay Ho!” along with them. Anybody who has eaten the (iodised) salt of this land should be indeed proud of this moment! I love this new trend so much - "Vijay Ho!" scores over the old foreign sounding "Hic Hic Hurray", ever so convincingly!

“We may have brought back his spectacles, but what about his vision for our country?”, someone may ask.

“What about his values, his teachings, the path of non-violence, which he showed us?” asked another.

“How materialistic we have become. He must be turning in his grave” exclaimed another.

“No, he couldn’t. The urn containing his ashes were astonishingly found in Cuttack in 2008, 60 years after his death in 1948, and were immersed in the Triveni Sangam by his great grandson, Tushar Gandhi, albeit after a long drawn struggle with bureaucrats, though”, I wanted to say. But then I realized what he said was only figurative and symbolic. But it must have been a significant blow to the image of the greatest leader India has known in the last century.

But wouldn’t Gandhiji's image be immune to these blows by now? After all, we have been punching it all along for almost half a century. Ever since his image appears on all the currency notes, to begin with. Faith can move mountains. But to move files in the government, you need to have faith in our currency notes and the power they wield in getting these things happen. The debauchery involved around the currency note has dealt the first blow to Mahatma Gandhi's image, several years ago.

We have immortalized Gandhiji by naming every important street leading to the railway stations in every suburb, town of our country after him! That was another blow! Considering the several nefarious activities that go on in those streets - bootlegging, gambling, soliciting, you name it – it’s happening out there on MG Road anywhere! One needs to look through his eyes, not his spectacles to look for those values that he tried to sow in our countrymen. Today bootleggers claim to be "serving our country"!

So would the image of our greatest leader, Mahatma Gandhi, even feel the slightest jolt, due to this materialistic incline, this act of selling his material possessions, one wonders?

Vijay Ho!


Bloggers’ PostScript:
Though one may not be able to do much about our values or those of our fellow countrymen nor the value of our currency, one could design the symbol of the Indian Rupee! If your symbol is selected, you could be as famous as Vijay Mallya or Sant Chatwal overnight!

Read all about it here!

And more here!

Vote for me at Dubbagol!